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BrainStorm spits about irony…


i·ro·ny noun, plural -nies.

1. The use of words to convey a meaning that is the opposite of its literal meaning

Is it ironic that my favorite song is “The Safety Dance”, by Men Without Hats (Thank you Canada), yet I hate dancing? I’m also a little confused about Alanis Morissette’s song, “Ironic”(Huge thanks to Canada). A lot of people have told me that the song is not about irony but instead just about shitty things happening. Well upon further research I beg to differ, people arguing Alanis’ lyrics. Although she may have left out a few words to convey opposite meanings of actual meanings, she is allowed to. It is a song not a novel. Alanis’ net-worth is around $45 million which means she’s done everything right.

Next note on irony: A couple of nights ago I was on my enormous balcony enjoying a stunning view of the mountains when I noticed a few hundred bicyclists on the street below. Apparently it’s a Wednesday night gathering called, “Let’s cycle around on Wednesday night and look like idiots”. While observing the immaculate display of fireworks from Elitch’s along with the retards and dipshits below, something came to me. All of these folks are simply pretenders. These fuckers ride for two hours a week and make a complete mockery of my sole means of transportation as well as make me look like them, assholes. Most of them are dressed in miscellaneous costumes and some with just top hats. Why the sudden urge to be different or ‘ouuuutrrrraageouuuus’? That shit is for Halloween. Another observation I made was when they approached a red light. Some would blow right through, and some would stop as if they were morally obligated to stop while at the same time they’re completely fucking traffic anyways. Why bother? What really takes the cake with this whole thing is that eventually some sort of regulator with a whistle and a bull horn showed up to make sure all the drunken cyclists stopped at this particular light. Great values, pretenders! Turns out I noticed that I, too, do what I love for only a few hours a week. Skateboard. Guess I’m the same as all these bastards. Isn’t it ironic, don’t you think? Signing off, Brainstorm Certified Pretender, Dipshit, and Asshole 321 Get Fucked Denver, CO P.S. Lemme know if you’re out there. First two to comment get a free hat or tee-shirt (Upon noLove Approval)

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